Sexual abuse is an unfortunately common form of trauma We often think of sexual abuse as an adult perpetrator abusing a minor, or an adult perpetrator abusing another adult, but sibling sexual abuse is another form of abuse and trauma that people are not aware of.
How Common is Sibling Sexual Abuse?
Sibling sexual abuse is often underreported, leading to many cases being unknown. Due to the close relationship as siblings, many individuals who are being abused or who have been abused do not speak up. This may be out of fear of not being believed, fear of the abuse worsening, or not knowing how to navigate such a complex relationship.
According to RAINN, the Rape, Incest & Abuse National Network, most youth know the perpetrator of their abuse. To further show the significance of this, 34% of youth are sexually abused by a family member, which is also referred to as incest. [1]
What Constitutes Sexual Abuse by a Sibling?
Sexual abuse by a sibling can take on many forms, and is similar to other forms of sexual abuse. What makes sibling sexual abuse different is that the perpetrator is engaging in the sexual acts with their own sibling. Sexual behaviors may include both physical and non-physical behaviors. Physical sexual abuse by a sibling can look like inappropriate touching, affection, digital or oral sex, intercourse and more. Sexual abuse that is non-physical may look like spying, trying to look at a naked body or genitals, exposure to child pornography, photographing, and making inappropriate sexual comments. [2]
What Causes a Child to Sexually Abuse Another Child?
There is no one specific cause as to why a child would sexually abuse another child, however there are risk factors that make certain populations more vulnerable to sexually inappropriate behaviors.
A child who was exposed to sexual abuse or sexual themes may re-enact those behaviors on another child. In the case of sibling sexual abuse, siblings may act out what they’ve seen or what has happened to them on a sibling.
Other risk factors that may cause a child to abuse another child are mental health problems, problems in the home, behavioral problems, and sometimes developmental delays. [3]
A natural part of development in children is sexual curiosity. While this is a normal part of life, it can become abnormal when a child or teenager engages in inappropriate sexual behaviors or acts with their siblings. There are plenty of resources available for the child or preteen who is curious to learn more about sexual health, which are delivered in safe, accurate, and age appropriate ways.
Long-Term Affects of Sibling Sexual Abuse
One of the most commonly known impacts of any type of trauma, and particularly abuse is post traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD. This goes for sibling sexual abuse as well. PTSD is a disorder defined by experience of or exposure to a scary, shocking, or traumatic event. [4]
Symptoms of PTSD include:
- Flashbacks of the event
- Sleep disturbances
- Feeling alone
- Loss of interest in activities
- Anger outbursts
- Startling easily
- Irritability
- Negative beliefs about self
Abuse that is perpetrated by a sibling is very complex and deep and can create many long term effects for the survivor. Some of the most prevalent impacts of sibling sexual abuse are lack of self-esteem, difficulty establishing self-worth, hypersexuality, aversion to sexual behavior, not wanting to be touched physically, trust issues, and eating disorders. Just like other forms of trauma or abuse, there are a wide array of reactions, symptoms, and impacts. Each individual may be different in their response to a traumatic experience such as sibling sexual abuse.
Healing From Sibling Sexual Abuse
Survivors of sibling sexual abuse can absolutely heal from their past traumas.
Having a positive support system is one of the main components of healing from the wounds caused by adverse experiences. Support systems are able to provide an ear to listen and ongoing validation. In addition to family and friends, trained professionals such as therapists can assist in the healing journey.
There are many models of therapy that are used to help survivors overcome all kinds of trauma, including sibling abuse traumas. Talking one on one to a therapist has many benefits, and another form of therapy such as a support group can help survivors connect with others who have been through the same experience without the stigma associated with sexual abuse. Oftentimes, individuals recovering from a trauma feel more connected to others when they attend support groups, as those people truly understand the pain and suffering caused by the specific trauma.
Alyssa Biestek is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) in both Texas and Florida. She currently works for a small group practice and enjoys helping children, teenagers, and their families heal. Alyssa has experience providing treatment to high risk youth in a community mental health setting and is trained in Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) and Trauma Focused-Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (TF-CBT). She is currently furthering her education and training to become a Registered Play Therapist (RPT). In her spare time, Alyssa enjoys reading, crafting, spending time outdoors, and playing with her dog.
