Emotional abuse in the workplace is an often overlooked issue, especially in today’s fast-paced and competitive professional landscape.
Many forms of mistreatment are considered “par for the course,” but may actually be abusive behaviors. As people spend a large portion of their time at work, emotional and psychological abuse in the workplace can have devastating effects on overall well-being. Hence why it is important to recognize and address the harmful impacts of this type of mistreatment at work.
What is Considered Emotional Abuse in the Workplace?
Emotional abuse in the workplace can present through a variety of behaviors, usually these behaviors cause significant distress and are targeted at an individual with the goal of controlling or manipulating the person.
If the abuse represents a pattern of behavior, it may also be considered workplace bullying or harassment. While there are many tactics used to perpetrate emotional abuse, the outcome is often psychological harm and a hostile work environment.
How Prevalent is Mental and Emotional Workplace Abuse?
According to the 2021 survey conducted by the Workplace Bullying Institute [1] 30% of adult Americans have experienced abusive conduct at work.
Additionally, virtual work has an even higher prevalence of abusive conduct at 43.2%. In total it is estimated that 48.6 million Americans are bullied at work [1].
While a large portion of workers experience abuse, many feel unable to recognize what is normal conflict and what might constitute a more serious problem. Because this typeof abuse can be so subtle, companies might also struggle to recognize emotional abuse in the workplace and support victims.
What Are the Signs You’re Being Emotionally Abused at Work?
It is important that targets of workplace bullying are able to recognize signs of emotional abuse. Some forms of emotional abuse are easy to “rationalize away” and therefore hard to identify. Common signs of emotional abuse are:
- Feeling overly controlled
- Being the target of hypercrticism
- Your concerns are routinely dismissed
- Being the target of public humiliation
- Being Isolated from your colleagues
- Held to unrealistic expectations or standards that others are not
- Having personal boundaries be violated
- Constantly having your job security threatened
If you are feeling trapped, like you will never be able to find anything better, or fearful of a person or group of people you may be experiencing workplace emotional abuse. These are also signs to look out for in order to recognize if a co-worker may be experiencing abuse.
What are Examples of Emotional Abuse in the Workplace?
Emotional abuse in the workplace can often be written off as normal behavior, or “just what you have to get through” in order to progress in your career. But no one should have to experience emotional abuse at the hand of a boss or colleage–or anyone, for that matter.
Some examples of workplace abuse are:
- Verbal abuse: Verbal abuse can consist of sarcastic remarks,name-calling, yelling, or making derogatory or belittling statements.
- Impacting work: This may be done by withholding needed information or otherwise sabotaging a project.
- Isolation or social neglect: The abuser(s) intentionally separates the target from meetings and social events, or hinders the target’s ability to participate in their job.
- Silent treatment: The silent treatment can be perpetrated by both groups and individuals and contributes to feelings of isolation and exclusion. The perpetrator may stop responding for a period of time or refuse to acknowledge the target at all.
- Mobbing: Coined by Dr. Heinz Leymann [2], mobbing is essentially bullying perpetuated by a group instead of an individual.
- Spreading rumors: Gossip is a tactic that can be used in order to have others participate in the abuse and further create a hostile environment. Some may be aware and actively contributing but others may not realize they are perpetuating emotional abuse.
- Angry outbursts: Arguments and conflict are another common tactic used in emotional abuse. The anger may be related to an incident but can also feel random or may stem from the perpetrator challenging unnecessary things. Often, the perpetrator will continue to be angry and attempt to continue conflict even when they are proven wrong or a solution has been found.
- Gaslighting: This is a form of manipulation with the intention of causing the target to distrust their own sense of reality. This often results in the target feeling unable to speak up, or that if they do, they will not be believed.
These emotionally abusive behaviors contribute to both psychological harm and create a hostile work environment.
How Does Workplace Abuse Affect Performance?
Workplace harassment can have a significant impact on performance.
According to a 2010 Scandinavian study [3] targets of workplace abuse experienced significant levels of pessimistic, emotional exhaustion and feelings of burnout.
A 2019 study [4] found that bullying results in employee withdrawal including absenteeism, which is when a target stops coming to work and can be at risk of losing their job.
Emotional abuse at work can impact concentration and focus leading to declining performance and increased overall stress. In fact, most workplace bullying only stops after the target has been fired, transfers or quits [1].
Additionally, this impacts companies as well as the individual, as organizations can lose otherwise good employees due to bullying. If the harassment used protected class information the company may also face legal action.
What Are the Physical and Mental Health Concerns Surrounding Workplace Emotional Abuse?
Similar to abusive relationships the effects of emotional abuse can cause serious mental and physical health problems.
Ongoing exposure to emotional abuse is a form of trauma and can cause PTSD and C-PTSD (complex post-traumatic stress disorder). It may also exacerbate underlying mental health conditions such as anxiety and depression and affect the target’s overall sense of self-worth [5]. Victims of emotional abuse may experience shame and guilt around the abuse.
Psychological harassment of any kind can cause a “domino effect” and impact physical health as well. Another study [6] found that emotional abuse may be contributing factors to the development and/or severity of illnesses such as chronic fatigue syndrome and fibromyalgia. Recognizing emotional abuse is important as chronic pain, headaches, insomnia and overall poorer health status are associated with being the victim of emotional abuse.
Emotional Abuse in the Workplace: How to Survive It
It can be incredibly challenging to navigate emotional abuse in the workplace as there is often a fear of losing a job or retaliation. But if you find yourself in an unhealthy work environment you are not powerless.
- Establish boundaries: This can look like standing up for yourself and informing the abuser of how you expect to be treated. This may not always work, but you can also set boundaries at work such as making requests to not work with the person, or taking time off as needed.
- Avoid engagement: When you are able, limit your exposure to your abuser(s).
- Document as much as possible: Having a record of the abuse can help you if you choose to inform management or pursue legal action. It can also help you feel grounded if gaslighting is causing you to question if you are being abused.
- Seek organizational support: This may be from upper management or HR.
- Take care of your overall wellness: This includes continuing to participate in self-care activities such as exercise, meditation, hobbies, and eating and sleeping well.
- Talk to trusted people: This may be a co-worker, a friend, a family member, or a therapist. You do not have to suffer alone.
- Create an exit plan: While quitting may not be an option for some, if you have sought support and attempted to resolve the harassment and the abuse continues, preparing an exit plan and finding a new job should be considered. Your well-being is important.
Zack Ehrmann (MAEd, LMHC, LPC) is a writer and licensed psychotherapist in three states. Employed in the field since 2011, he’s been fortunate to work across demographics and populations in a variety of settings, including community health clinics, state and local governance, major hospitals, and private practice.
